The Overflow ...
Knew What He Wanted
This is an oldie, and we've seen it credited to everybody from "selected" to "anonymous" to "exchange." But we still get a chuckle out of it. The negro pastor prayed: "0, Lawd, give Thy servant dis mawnin' de eye of de eagle and de wisdom of de owl; connect his soul with de gospel-teleform in de central skies; 'luminate his brow with de sun of Heaven; saturate his heart with love for de people; turpentine his 'magination; grease his lips with 'possom oil; loosen his tongue with de sledge hammer of Thy power; 'lectrify his brain with de lightenin' of Thy Word; put 'petual motion in him plumb full of de dynamite of glory; 'noint him all over with de kerosine oil of salvation, and sot him on fire!"
"Excommunicated"
From the Gospel Advocate of June 6, 1961, we lift this news item: W. Ralph Wharton, P. O. Box 12, Grand Bay, Ala., May 29: "Yesterday two were baptized and two restored. One was excommunicated." Then there was the lady at St. Matthews, Kentucky, who was recently "christened." Which reminds us of the story J. D. Tant used to tell about the Holy-Roller camp meeting in which one of the more portly sisters present got "un der the power" and began to shout thanksgivings to God that she had been "baptized, sanctified, and glorified!" .... and was " going to be anathematized just as quick as she could get to it!"
* * Sequel To "Have You A Better Plan?" When promoters get together As promoters often do, To discuss the whys and wherefores Of the schemes they're putting through; They take the Bible and they twist it, To fit their purpose if they call; So just smile and ask them sweetly, "Where's the Scripture for your plan?" — Guthrie Dean "The Only Way To Do It"
"Brethren, I am convinced the Children's Home is not only best — it is the only way we can discharge this duty — and it is, at the same time, in complete harmony with the Word of God." (Quotation from Joe M. Lyon, published in the Church of Christ Children's Home bulletin.)
* * * He Proved It
Then there was the psychiatrist who was evaluating the effects, if any, of alcohol. First he drank whiskey and water, which made him drunk. Then he drank brandy and water, with the same result. A day or so later he tried rum and water; again with the same result. The psychiatrist concluded that water is intoxicating.
* * * Baccalaureate Speaker
Some of the brethren were wondering if brother Pat Boone's rapid descent into the slime of Hollywood's cess-pool "sex movies" would make any difference in his acceptance by the liberal brethren among us. Need they wonder? On May 28 he was scheduled to give the baccalaureate address at Harding College (where they "emphasize the spiritual"), and there can he little question that his invitations to preach and sing in the liberal churches far exceed any time he might have available.
* * * Old Folks' Home
Amid a wild fanfare of publicity, with bugle calls, flourishes, and the crescendo of drum-beats in a mounting wave of propaganda, a certain "Church of Christ Old Folks' Home" was launched in Texas three or four years ago. A gospel preacher told us recently of the one time he visited the home — they had six inmates at that time: Five aged Baptist ladies, and one aged Methodist lady, most of whom (if not all) were either financially independent in their own right, or had grown children who were amply able to provide for them.
Schedule * * *
The week this issue appears in your mail box the editor will be in a meeting at Tularosa, New Mexico. Itinerary after that includes meetings at Burney, California, (August 6-13) and Puyallup, Washington, (August 20-271. We will return to Fort Smith early in September to work with Robert Jackson as he does the preaching in a meeting at Park Hill; then will go to Racine, Wisconsin, and Horse Cave (Green's Chapel), Kentucky, for meetings the latter part of September. Our week-night classes will be resumed here at Park Hill Church the first week in October.
* * * Bound Volumes
If you intend to order one of the Bound Volumes of the Gospel Guardian, you will do us a real favor by ordering it NOW. We have a few copies of Volume Ten left, a few more of Volume Eleven, and an ample supply of Volume Twelve. The books are $5.00 per copy. We are happy to have orders from a number of congregations. Why not donate these volumes each year to the church library where you attend? They will be invaluable as a history of the various congregations in years to come.
* * * Really Tired!
Then there was this lady who was so tired she could hardly keep her mouth open.
* * Different-Colored Horse "The problem is simple, Solution is clear; I can't see a reason For worry or fear. The action to take is So plain to define: I'd trade in a minute Your problem for mine. — Jean Carpenter Mergard * * * As He Sees Himself
The Pope of Rome has been called many things by many people. It is only fair play to take a glimpse at the other side of the story — what he calls himself! According to a brief note in Eugene Britnell's paper (The Sower) here is the way the Arkansas Democrat of March 23, 1961, lists the spiritual titles of Pope John XXIII: "Bishop of Rome, Vicar of Jesus Christ, Successor of St. Peter, Prince of the Apostles, Supreme Pontiff of the Universal Church, Patriarch of the West, Primate of Italy, Archbishop and Metropolitan of the Roman Province, and Sovereign of the State of Vatican City." ... ("And on the seventh day he rested!")