The Overflow
"Doctor" Goodpasture
We see by the papers that Harding College recently conferred an honorary "doctorate" on Brother B. C. Goodpasture. This will now enable our brother editor to be relieved of the terrible feelings of frustration and inadequacy which must have plagued him in his association with other "doctors" in the land. He can now regard himself as an equal with such notables as Doctor George De-Hoff, Doctor Albert Garner, Doctor Ira North, Doctor Oral Roberts and even Doctor Pepper. Indeed, this is such an honor that he will likely be confiding to his associates, "Don't call me Alex; call me Doc!" By the way, how many Texans remember how the founder of the Firm Foundation met his Waterloo as "Doctor Burlington"?
Vacation Bible School
A recent bulletin of the Riverwood Church in Nashville, Tennessee, asked that all members bring their old broken pieces of jewelry to the church building so that the young people in "Vacation Bible School" could have the pieces to work on in their craft class! And Brother Charles Crouch, preacher for that church, is one who thinks some of his brethren have become "extremists"! No comment.
Educated
Speaking of "doctor's degrees", a Korean war veteran still gets a smile when he recalls the day he was inducted into the Army. After his physical, he was directed to a desk behind which sat a Sergeant with a sheaf of papers and a rubber stamp. The Sergeant looked up and asked him, "Ever been to grammar school?"
"Yes, sir," said the draftee proudly, "I went through grammar school, high school, and graduated magna cume laude from college. I then completed three years of graduate work at U.C.L.A., and have acquired two more degrees from Columbia I also have an honorary doctorate..."
The Sergeant nodded, picked up his rubber stamp, and slapped it on the questionnaire. One word appeared there: "Literate."
Schedule
Preaching schedule for this editor for the next few weeks goes something like this: Santa Barbara, California, July 27-31; Alameda, California, August 2-7; El Cerrito, California, August 9-16; East San Jose, California, August 17-21; Seattle, Washington, August 30-September 6; Renton, Washington, September 6-13; Kansas City, Missouri, September 27-October 2; Blytheville, Arkansas, October 4-9; McAlester, Oklahoma, October 12-23; Florence, Alabama, November 1-6; Franklin, Tennessee, November 8-13; Mulvane, Kansas, November 29-December 6. The entire month of January, 1960, will be filled with engagements in the lower Rio Grande Valley of Texas.
Women's business meeting
We have seen a report from one of the churches in Detroit which shows that the "women of the congregation" met on a certain date for their "annual business meeting" What next?
Convincing
We've found several people lately (all the way from Tennessee to New Mexico) who tell us they had never heard anything at all about current issues until they heard one of Harper's famous "hate the Guardian" tirades — a vituperative, venom filled oration which he is delivering in many places now. And they tell us that in that one speech Brother Harper convinced them absolutely — that any project on earth which can so fill a man's heart with hatred MUST be unscriptural, regardless of how many stations are carrying it, or how many doctors approve it!
Poor Louis XVI!
The unhappy king of France was a man with a terrific inferiority complex — so he got his fawning courtiers to give all sorts of banquets in his honor, compose toasts to him compare him to Alexander the Great, Julius Caesar, and the mighty men of the past. Finally in a desperate effort to make himself as tall as other men he began to have his boots made with extremely high heels — so his people just chopped off his head to bring him down to size! There might be a lesson here (but we doubt that it will be heeded) for those brethren who have such an insatiable appetite for the "honors" and flattery of their sycophants.
No, thanks!
The editor had the delightful experience a while back of meeting a stranger at a social function who, upon being introduced, asked, "Are you any kin to this Tant fellow that is splitting so many churches all over the nation." We assured him to the contrary, and added that no relative had ever split any church so far as we knew. We then rather cautiously enquired about the noted "church splitter". Well, he had never seen the fellow, but he really gave us a description of him! Not only is this editor not kin to the man described and has never met him — but he doesn't care to!
And if the devil ever gets weary of his job and wants to take a vacation for a few weeks, we are certain "this Tant fellow" could pinch hit for him with considerable success — according to our friend's description and estimate. But the devil better not prolong that vacation unduly; he's liable to find himself out of a job when he comes back!
"Brother Hardeman's church"
A few weeks ago a couple were moving from Nashville, Tennessee, to Tampa, Florida. Desiring to learn the location of a congregation in Tampa, they asked one of the Nashville preachers about it. "You must be very careful," he warned them. "I understand the extremists and hobby-riders have about taken over Florida, and especially Tampa. However, Brother Pat Hardeman is down there, so I suggest you find the church where he is and go to Brother Hardeman's church." This young couple looked in vain for "Brother Hardeman's church", and, failing to find it, began worshipping with one of the several faithful congregations in the city. They did finally find Brother Hardeman — preaching for the Unitarians, a total victim of the liberalism with which many others in the brotherhood have become infected in recent years.
"You're right"
The way our brother editor (of the Firm Foundation) happily agrees with the institutional brethren whom he says are wrong brings to memory this story of an agreeable jurist who was determined to please everybody: "Your Honor," said the plaintiff, "my wife is a pain in the neck, and I'm elevating it to say so. She doesn't cook supper for me, she's out playing cards all night, and she neglects our children. I want a divorce, and I'm entitled to it."
The judge answered solemnly, "You're right."
The wife spoke up, "But, Your Honor, he stays away from home for days at a time. He comes home drunk and beats me! I want a hundred dollars a week and custody of the children, and I think I ought to have it."
The judge nodded solemn agreement. "You are right," said he.
One of the lawyers spoke up in protest, "But, Your Honor, they can't BOTH be right."
The judge looked at him happily and nodded, "You are right, too."
Purely personal
It fell the happy privilege of this writer on June 18 at Haynesville, Louisiana, to speak the words that united in marriage Jefferson David Tant and Flora Sue Hartsell. A happier bride and groom we have never seen. Daughter of a faithful elder in the Haynesville congregation, and one of ten children, Flora Sue is well acquainted with the trials and problems that beset a preacher's family — three of her brothers are preachers, two sisters are married to preachers, and assorted uncles and cousins also expound the word. The Tants will be living at Clayton, Oklahoma, where David will be preaching.
Sermon topics
On Sunday, May 31, according to the bulletin of the Riverside congregation, Wichita, Kansas, the gospel preacher at that church edified the saints with a gospel sermon on the subject: "The Naughty Lady From Shady Lane." Which suggests to us a real good sermon subject for Paul at Philippi: "The Jail-House Rock". (They were singing in that jail, weren't they?' And what a great lesson could be given on Paul's admonition to "Beware of the dogs" (Phil. 3:2), under the subject: "You Ain't Nothin' But A Hound Dawg!" And just think what a splendid title could be found for a sermon on the woman at Jacob's well: "She Wouldn't Have Did What She Done If She Had Knowed What She Should Have Knew."
Starting next week
Brother Roy E. Cogdill's review of the book by Dr. J. D. Thomas, "We Be Brethren", will start next week. It will extend over some five or six weeks, and when it is concluded Brother Thomas will be given whatever space he may desire to respond to it. This is fair and honorable treatment between "brethren", and is the normal policy of this journal. Read Brother Cogdill's articles as they appear, and let your study of the problem be honest and sincere. Your eternal destiny may well depend on your attitude toward such matters — regardless of which "side" you are on, a prejudiced, closed-mind attitude is wrong and sinful.