Letter To Uncle Zeke
Dear Uncle Zeke, You would never guess what the preacher at TurkeyRun did Sunday night week, not even if you was to guess all day. Guess I best slow down, back up, and let you know what caused me to carry on so.
You know near ever one of the men over here at Turkey Run's got hisself addicted to burnin cornsilk, or some foul smellin weed. Seems they get some joy out of burnin their lungs to a cinder. Well the preacher over here has done purtty well near ever-thin to try to get the brethren to give up their nasty habit. Just ever-thin he had tried so far had done failed. Well, you know our preacher, he's as steady as a bull-dog what's got hisself fast to the seat of your pants when he sets out to shed the church of a problem. I do believe he whipped this problem for shore.
Sunday night, he preached a sermon at is called, "Spiritual Mindedness." It dealt with as how we ought to be spiritual minded in all what we do. He allowed as how we should show some spiritual mindedness in the way we think, the way we live, and in the way we worship.
Uncle Zeke, he no more than got started when he pulled out a store bought cigarette, you know, one of them whats alread rolled for you, and lit that thing right there before our eyes. Why, everybody there let his jawbone drop like a hot biscuit. You should of seen the way them jaws was a flappin. They looked like a pair of fresh washed britches flappin in a stiff breeze.
That preacher didn't say nary a word about that cigarette all durin his sermon. That's right, he just kep right on a spoutin scripture about spiritual things with that cigarette burnin up right in his hand. He never once puffed on the thing, he just let it burn.
When ever he was through he pointed out to us that a cigarette and spiritual things go together about as good as a callico cat and a goldfish. He shore did get his message across to us that time. Two of the brethren got the point so well they said they was goin to give up smokin altogether.
I got a talkie to the preacher about what he had done, and he told me that opportunity's, like hen eggs, only come one at a time. He said he had one of them opportunity's to do some good and he done it.
We ever one was shocked, but we shore did get the message. Such a event aint never took place here before and probably aint about to take place agin, but it shore will be one long remembered.
You will take real good care of yourselves. Come see us if'n you get able.
Your faithful nephew,